fairycosmos:

not to be earnest and sincere but using this site really is starting to feel like a genuinely unique and enjoyable experience compared to most other social media apps and how they operate now. and i think all of the cringe i used to feel at still being on tumblr after all these years is turning into unabashed fondness for the people and the environment on here

Thank you for your kind words. I’m doing a little better. His mom has also apologized. Thank you for your prayers ❤

I need some prayer

I feel like no one cares about me. I have no friends, my closest friend is my husband and we’re always fighting. I want to kill myself again. My depression has gotten so bad that I don’t want to get up in the morning, I’m missing work or coming in late. It’s gotten to the point that I want to crash my car just so I don’t have to go in for my shift. I haven’t been sleeping well for the past 3 months. I just want to take a bunch of pills and make it all go away. I feel so unwanted and unloved. My faith has tanked, I haven’t read my bible, I haven’t really prayed. I just feel like God’s not there, and doesn’t care.

I’m living with my husband and his family right now and I saw some messages and conversations from his mom. His mom said she wants to rip my face off. I know I’ve been a little mean and my depression doesn’t excuse my actions but why would you say that about someone. She doesn’t want me here. I feel like no one wants me here. At work I’m just the work horse that does the all the work and carries the team so I can’t even get a mental health day off. I hate my life so much. I just want to die.

feralphoenix:

graylinesspam:

chiibbo:

jkl-fff:

maramahan:

808lien:

colacharm:

wildlyannoyingdoofus:

colacharm:

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

1. never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.
2. find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.
3. talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore
4. picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else
5. if someone makes you feel bad most of the time, stop talking to them. making yourself hang out with people who drain you is self harm. stop it.

… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

This is so important

That self-aggrandizing technique is no joke.

I replaced “I’m stupid” with “I’m a God damn genius.” “Move over newton” “another masterpiece”

I replaced “gross/ disgusting” with “sexy/attractive” “the hight of elegance”

I replaced “I suck/ that sucked/ this is bad” with “fantastic”, “a lovely time”, “ swell/jolly good”

Replace every negative with a positive. Say it so sarcastically. Make it complicated make it entertaining have fun with it.

It will stop your self deprecating and build confidence. And people are more easygoing around you.

#a good stopgap is being neutral rather than negative/positive #when i drop smth at work i just say #ah… gravity. #and move on (tags by @whatever-you-can-give-me )

^^^ to those of you who complain that it feels weird or uncomfortable or not genuine to immediately switch to self-aggrandizement, try this instead!!! nobody on this post is kidding that it helps - you’re basically building a manual override for the mental pathways your brain is used to so you can switch those train tracks

kweza-deactivated20221020:

still cannot believe someone woke up and unironically typed this:

ampiyas:

honestly it’s almost like our generation is set up to be lonelier & more anxious & more insane like imagine already being 20/30-something, the period of your life where you’re expected to be “at your prime”, in the middle of a climate crisis and a pandemic, under late-stage capitalism’s celebrity culture that conditions you to be as likeable & “marketable” as possible, where it seems like every lived experience should be watchable/profitable. & you look at the future you’re supposed to be working hard for & all you see is climate catastrophe meanwhile you scroll down a little & see a skin care ad that’s like “fight aging”. i haven’t said anything here that hasn’t already been said by someone else, but imagine being 20/30-something & normal